We all remember our first show. For most of us, it spun into a lifetime of music loving, not music making. For some, though, it stirred in them a sense of purpose. For the month of April, we’ll be asking some artists we love to write about their first show, the one they saw when they didn’t know what was coming, but they figured out what they wanted it to sound like.
First up, we have The Grahams! The Grahams are lifelong romantic partners, Alyssa and Doug Graham, who lit out for adventure from New York City to make music along the Great River Road. The Grahams will be playing the Lively Lounge next week, and you can win exclusive tracks and other prizes here. Now, Alyssa tells the story of their first show, when they were just kids.
It was the year of, “A Touch of Grey” and my older brother (who was one of Doug’s best friends) reluctantly gave me my first tie dye t-shirt after much begging. I say reluctantly because he made me name 10 Grateful Dead songs before he would relinquish one of his precious T’s. I barely knew who they were, as I was still listening to a lot of Cyndi Lauper and Carol King, but I really wanted to be part of my brothers’ “cool” world. I was miraculously able to ramble off 9 songs but the 10th was a stumper. Finally, it came to me, “Box of Rain!” Well, my brother gave me the T-shirt but he was genuinely angry that I knew that song. “Box of Rain” was his favorite song and he didn’t think a newbie like me deserved to even utter the words “Box of Rain.” Not yet anyway.
However, my brother also wanted me to learn and learn I did. The next month, The Grateful Dead were coming to Brendan Byrne Arena and of course he was attending with his cool group of hippie friends. To my surprise, he offered not only to chaperone my girlfriend and me to the concert but he asked one of his friends (who drove a van!) to take us with them to the show.
Nobody had a ticket, which I found very strange, as this was my first concert and I thought a ticket was a pretty important part of the “attending.” However, once I reached the parking lot (the van experience was a whole other story I could tell) I was thrust into a new world and the concert itself seemed negligible. It was a world of, to be cliché’, Peace, Love & Hippies. I wanted to be in that world forever. The colors, the scents, the sounds, the chaos, and the wonder opened up a new way of life for me and I never left… well, not in my heart anyway.
After a few hours of bliss in the parking lot, I ran into my brother again and he had two tickets for Karen and me. Honestly, we had forgotten about the concert, but we were excited. This was our first experience, and it was already beyond our wildest dreams. That was before the music.
When we entered the arena, we struggled to find our seats through the maze of dancing beauties, drummer boys, and clowns, but soon got settled and were sitting next to a guy we knew from school. He was also older than us but very kind and hospitable as he immediately offered us some Opium. Yes, Opium! Well, why not, we had experienced so many new things already, one more couldn’t hurt. The lights went down, my heart was pounding, the crowd was screaming and, “The Music Never Stopped.”
I can’t remember the set list that night or the thoughts in my head but when the lights finally turned on I was changed. I had entered a world of music that gave me freedom.
When I exited the arena with the masses, I bumped right in to Doug. He had one side of his head shaved those days and was wearing a Rasta tam. He was indeed a sight for sore eyes and as always smiling from ear to ear. It wasn’t Doug’s first concert. He had seen Neil Young several years earlier at Madison Square Garden with his older brother (I learned later that prostitutes tried to pick them up after the show) and this was for sure not his first Dead show.
The last and most memorable moment from that night, the night of my first concert, was Doug (only my friend at the time) grabbing me by the hand and whisking me around the parking lot in a full spin singing out loud, “I wanna tell you how it’s gonna be, you’re gonna give your love to me, I wanna love you night and day, know our love will not fade away.”